The Gay Samaritan

It's funny how close sane people come to insanity every day.  (or every night as it were).

I was driving home from work.  The sky was ridiculously blue, and I was letting my imagination run wild.  I was remembering a dream I had of a time when I was at Seminary learning everything there is to know about God (they would have you believe).  And in my dream, Jesus was there; teaching one of my classes.

And also there was a ferret sitting next to me taking notes.

(The ferret who was dressed like a hipster with an anti-stylish coffee mug setting on his desk, was making sure that everyone around him knew he was drinking the finest freshest roasted coffee in the land).

As Jesus was speaking I could tell that my seminary professor (known for his stand on moral issues and family values) was concerned about the apparent "reckless" teachings of Jesus on the subject of love.  And so he stood up with a question to test Jesus and he stated his question like this:  “So, Professor...... what do I NEED to do to GET eternal life?”. He asked.

Jesus answered, “What’s written in the Bible.  How do you interpret it?”He said,

“That you love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and muscle and intelligence—and that you love your neighbor as well as you do yourself". 

The ferret leaned towards me and whispered, "All you need is love".  

"Good answer!” said Jesus. “Do it and you’ll live.

But looking for a loophole, he asked, “And just how would you define ‘neighbor’?”

Jesus answered by telling a story. “There was once an old blues man traveling down 11th street.  He was walking with nothing but the clothes on his back and a well used electric-blue guitar.  About half way down the road he was attacked by some young punks.  They took his clothes, and his guitar, and beat him, and went off leaving him half-dead.

Luckily, a preacher was on his way down the same road, but when he saw the beaten man, he angled across to the other side of 11th street.

Then a religious man, a political activist, a real angry guy (looked just like Fred Phelps ...) showed up carrying his God hates fags signs.  But already late for his protest, and his hands full, he also avoided the injured man.

But just then a gay man was traveling down 11th street and came up on the injured blues man.  And when he saw the injured mans condition, his heart went out to him.  He gave him first aid, disinfecting and bandaging his wounds. Then he put him in the back seat of his car, made him comfortable and took him to the nearest Emergency Room just down the street.

He gave the receptionist his own information along with 500 dollars and told her, ‘Take good care of him. Im late for an important meeting and have to go.  But if it costs any more, I’ll be coming back to check on him, and I'll pay you on my way back.’

“What do you think? Which of the three became a neighbor to the man attacked by these young punks"?

“The one who treated him kindly,” the Seminary professor responded.

Jesus said, “Go and do the same.”

My mind was coming back to the road, but not before I noticed the clock on the wall melting (Salvador Dali-style).  The ferret, sitting at my side, took off his thick black rimmed glasses and stood (on his hind paws) giving a rousing round of applause.  And then ebbing into my "crazy", I resisted the returning sound of traffic (and "reality") and with one last burst of imagination I lifted up off the ground like a dragon-fly and flew off into the ridiculous, lunatic, electric-blue sky.