Kindness has the power to change the world.
I'm convinced of that now.
I know that... because during what turned out to be an all day event... (26 hours away from my house.... 20 hours without sleep.... 4 to 5 hours trapped on a highway.... 13 hours without food..... -9 degree wind chills.... 3 foot snow drifts...) What I found is that... while some people needed help themselves (in one way or another)... every person I came in contact with was willing to help others in whatever way they could. And when that finally comes home to you.... That the world can be good. It has the power to change the way you look at everything.
I wasn't as conscious of that when they first took me to the shelter. In fact I was still angry and frustrated. And the dude we picked up along the way (who was also stuck) didn't really help me feel the "goodness" all that much.
He was a good ol' boy that talked too much. And what he said came out like there was no filter between his mouth and his brain.
When he first got into the truck he started introducing himself like we were all waiting on him to start the party.
When he noticed me, (my scrubs) he asked what I did for a living, and I told him I worked at
Hillcrest as a nurse. Then he said... What does your wife do??... Construction?... (chuckle).
Then he said.... Do you guys have some kinda role reversal thing going??? Then he laughed and laughed and looked at me like I should be laughing too.
When we got to the shelter (community center)... One of the firemen immediately made coffee and they took down official information (name, car info... etc). The talking dude... started shoveling snow... (I was surprised by that).. And I began texting and calling friends again to try and get a ride home.
After helping shovel the community center entrance.... my new best friend (who already had a ride coming) sat down next to me and began talking about prostates.
You're a nurse... He said... Tell me... If you have surgery for cancer of the prostate (he might have said "prostRate")... does that mean you lose your "plumbing"? Cause I.. heard the surgery makes you lose your "plumbing". (He gestured casually to his crotch).
It was from that point on... that all he talked about to me was "plumbing". And it was also from that piont on that all I did was try to escape.
In between moments of distraction when he found someone else to talk to (which was frequently.... making his rounds at the party)... I continued texting....trying to get a ride home. Occasionally one of the younger fireman (looked like a kid) would come in and offer coffee. And somewhere along the way it began to occur to me that this place might be my new home for a few days.... And my stomach dropped.
Within the hour my new friend was climbing in the cab of a large white truck that was carrying him home. As the truck drove away... It felt like I was the last kid waiting to get picked up from kindergarten. And right in that moment I almost lost it.
After 21 hours without sleep I asked someone if there was someplace I could lay down and the younger "fire-kid" directed me into a pool-table-room and brought in a pillow. He apologized for not having a cot and said that the community center wasn't set up as a shelter. And then he hung around for a few seconds like he wanted to offer me more... but he was silent.... and we both knew that there was nothing more he could do.... nothing any of us could do. That we were all in the same boat and that all we could do was offer each other what we had.
It was then, I think, that I first started appreciating the situation and the people I was meeting along the way and all the stuff that I had...
(was alive... in a warm building.... access to hot coffee... All of my family and friends were ok...)
The fire-kid shut off the lights for me and closed the doors and I took off my wet socks and shoes..... And stretched out on the floor (it was cold)...
A little while later he brought me in a blanket and I fell into a very light exhausted type of sleep.
It seemed like just a little while later (in reality... 3 hours had passed) someone was coming in and waking me up and telling me that they had found me a ride home.
I hopped up... and said.... YOU'RE FREAKING KIDDING ME!!!
He said no... The guys from station 3 are heading near your house. They're gonna take you home.
I wanted to hug him... (but as a male nurse... I'm already behind the eight-ball on the "man thing")... So I just said THANKS (with the sound of disbelief).
He told me to get my stuff and to meet them out in the front of the building... so I did just that.
As I walked through the community center the "fire-kid" found me again and said... You should take some pizza with you on you're way out. I told him thanks.... but I wanted to wait to eat with my family when I got home. And then I popped into the truck and unbelievably we were heading out.
We dropped off another dude before me but I didn't care because I was on my way.
When we came into my neighborhood, they had to drop me at the entrance because the snow was too deep and there were cars stuck... blocking the way, but I didn't care because I was getting close.
As I walked through my neighborhood, I trudged through 3 feet snow drifts again. Like before... my feet, hands and face were getting numb. I had to stop a few times to catch my breath... but I didn't care because I was almost home.
As I came up to my house I was out of breath like a marathon runner.... and exhausted. Instead of lifting my arms to get out my keys I just hit the door a few times with my floppy arms... and it opened. My wife.. my four year old son were there to meet me and helped me inside. My daughter (8 years old) hugged me and gave me something she had written for me while I was gone.
After sitting for just a moment to catch my breath, I started texting my friends and family to let them know I was at home... safe. I ran my hot shower and went down stairs to pour myself my favorite adult beverage.
But before I stepped into my shower I said a prayer of thanks for getting home safely, and for all the goodness of people that I saw along the way. And I said a prayer for those who weren't home yet.
Then I drank to all of those who helped me (and helped others) and to all of my friends who worried and prayed. And I drank to a world that was suddenly full of goodness. And I prayed that the world could someday live like that always. And for the first time since I first got the Blues I looked into the future for just a little bit, and I believed that one day the world would finally do just that.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Snow-Pocalypse Blues (part 3)
Extreme temperatures tend to make you delusional, I think. (that's my theory at least...)
(or excuse...)
While I was sitting there.. watching trucks fly around me... others getting stuck... After hour #4, I was beginning to think that maybe this was in fact the apocalypse... And I began to imagine (or hallucinate about) what it would be like being home.
A Fireman was walking from stranded car to stranded car with yellow (crime scene?) tape.
(appropriate..... as it felt like we had all been accosted... Or maybe he was assuming we were dead).
When he approached my car... I rolled down the window and finding out I was alright..... (he seemed surprised)... he asked if I wanted a ride to the shelter.
No thank-you I said. But I told him I could use a ride home (only 2 miles away).
No can do... my friend... He said..... (everyone seemed happier than necessary considering the world was ending)... We're taking everyone to the shelter. Right now that's all we can do.
My mind flashed with images of refugees. Sad.. Hungry children. Breast feeding mothers. Appearances by Bono....
And so I told him I was gonna wait for a while and see if there was something else I could come up with (#7).
He said that they would be making rounds again occasionally.... and if I changed my mind I could get a ride to the shelter. After he left... I began to get serious about my plan to walk home (#8).
The first thing I did was prepare for extra warmth. I put my cold wet socks back on and wrapped my feet with ABD pads (Large Kotex-like Gauze dressings found laying in my car... left over from post-care of my tattoo). I put every pair of gloves on I could find.. (2 pairs of my own... One pair of Lisa's left behind in the car). I zipped up my coat and put 2 skull caps over my head (1 found in the car). And then I took my keys. Locked the door. And launched out.
At first it wasn't bad. It was cold. My feet sank into 6 inch snow. Then 10 inch snow. Then 18. Then 28. By the time I was off the highway I was treading through 3 feet of snow. It must have taken 15 minutes to get to the feeder road but it felt like an hour. My legs grew tired and I fell two times.
I found that falling in deep snow is like sinking in quick sand. (however with -9 degree windchill it's warmer under the snow. I was tempted to stay there).
By the time I got to the closed daycare up on the hill from the feeder road I knew I couldn't make it home. I stood there looking down the feeder towards my house... in denial. It took me about 15 minutes to catch up to reality... accept that I couldn't make it home (without dying).... And prepare to return to my car.
Before I began treading my way back though I stepped from public vision and pee'd near a 3 1/2 foot snow bank. After nearly five hours of waiting, it felt like I pee'd for about 10 minutes. And then I returned to my car.
(Fell twice and was so tired I had to role out of one snow bank.... down a small hill...).
By the time I returned to my car... I was covered in ice... the bottom of my scrub pants were frozen-starched stiff like bell bottoms. And when I returned to the warmth of my car, I took off my shoes and wet socks again and checked my I-phone. It was still stuck on Facebook.
"hot cider and snowman cookies with marshmallow hats"...
-friends cheery wife.
With those words I gave up and began looking for the Fire department again.
Within minutes the same dude was making his way from car to car checking to see if anyone was dead yet. And when he saw me I motioned that I was willing to go with them and then he helped me from my car... to the back of a large fire department truck where there was already another man in the back seat. We looked at each other sheepishly.
As I said goodbye to my car on the highway, I wondered if I would ever get home. And how. And I wondered if I would ever see my car again intact. And I wondered if this were infact the end of the world and if so, why Hell seemed so cold.
Part 4 to come.
(or excuse...)
While I was sitting there.. watching trucks fly around me... others getting stuck... After hour #4, I was beginning to think that maybe this was in fact the apocalypse... And I began to imagine (or hallucinate about) what it would be like being home.
A Fireman was walking from stranded car to stranded car with yellow (crime scene?) tape.
(appropriate..... as it felt like we had all been accosted... Or maybe he was assuming we were dead).
When he approached my car... I rolled down the window and finding out I was alright..... (he seemed surprised)... he asked if I wanted a ride to the shelter.
No thank-you I said. But I told him I could use a ride home (only 2 miles away).
No can do... my friend... He said..... (everyone seemed happier than necessary considering the world was ending)... We're taking everyone to the shelter. Right now that's all we can do.
My mind flashed with images of refugees. Sad.. Hungry children. Breast feeding mothers. Appearances by Bono....
And so I told him I was gonna wait for a while and see if there was something else I could come up with (#7).
He said that they would be making rounds again occasionally.... and if I changed my mind I could get a ride to the shelter. After he left... I began to get serious about my plan to walk home (#8).
The first thing I did was prepare for extra warmth. I put my cold wet socks back on and wrapped my feet with ABD pads (Large Kotex-like Gauze dressings found laying in my car... left over from post-care of my tattoo). I put every pair of gloves on I could find.. (2 pairs of my own... One pair of Lisa's left behind in the car). I zipped up my coat and put 2 skull caps over my head (1 found in the car). And then I took my keys. Locked the door. And launched out.
At first it wasn't bad. It was cold. My feet sank into 6 inch snow. Then 10 inch snow. Then 18. Then 28. By the time I was off the highway I was treading through 3 feet of snow. It must have taken 15 minutes to get to the feeder road but it felt like an hour. My legs grew tired and I fell two times.
I found that falling in deep snow is like sinking in quick sand. (however with -9 degree windchill it's warmer under the snow. I was tempted to stay there).
By the time I got to the closed daycare up on the hill from the feeder road I knew I couldn't make it home. I stood there looking down the feeder towards my house... in denial. It took me about 15 minutes to catch up to reality... accept that I couldn't make it home (without dying).... And prepare to return to my car.
Before I began treading my way back though I stepped from public vision and pee'd near a 3 1/2 foot snow bank. After nearly five hours of waiting, it felt like I pee'd for about 10 minutes. And then I returned to my car.
(Fell twice and was so tired I had to role out of one snow bank.... down a small hill...).
By the time I returned to my car... I was covered in ice... the bottom of my scrub pants were frozen-starched stiff like bell bottoms. And when I returned to the warmth of my car, I took off my shoes and wet socks again and checked my I-phone. It was still stuck on Facebook.
"hot cider and snowman cookies with marshmallow hats"...
-friends cheery wife.
With those words I gave up and began looking for the Fire department again.
Within minutes the same dude was making his way from car to car checking to see if anyone was dead yet. And when he saw me I motioned that I was willing to go with them and then he helped me from my car... to the back of a large fire department truck where there was already another man in the back seat. We looked at each other sheepishly.
As I said goodbye to my car on the highway, I wondered if I would ever get home. And how. And I wondered if I would ever see my car again intact. And I wondered if this were infact the end of the world and if so, why Hell seemed so cold.
Part 4 to come.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Snow-Pocalypse Blues (part 2)
Never underestimate the bodies ability to hold urine. Nurses understand this in ways that most of the general population can't. In the hospital world everyone's demands.... (patients... doctor's... all other medical personnel).... be it however great or small.... take priority over the nurses right
(that's right!!!!.... Rush Limbaugh.... I called it a right!!!!)
to pee as frequently as every other person on the planet.
I've spent more than a decade stretching and training my bladder to hold more and more urine. And I think... in Gods Providence.... it might have been in order to survive a urine crisis such as this.
I was sitting in my car.... stuck in the snow... Reeling from the bubble burst of not making it home. The sun was coming up but sheets of wind and snow were blowing over us keeping the sunlight dim. There were two cars in front of me. One beside me. About thirty or forty lined up behind.... all stuck. And I still had to go pee.
I had the heater going strong and for a few minutes I just watched as cars and SUV's arrogantly tried to drive around us... All of them getting trapped in the same snow pile. Half of them working hard to get themselves free. Each of them like ants... darting in and out of cars, splitting time between snow shoveling (5 to 10 minutes max without instant frozen death.... -small exaggeration) and sheltering themselves from the frigid wind.
End of hour # 1 on the highway,
Hour #2
I hooked up my I phone to my charger and then began to text my wife... and my boss and friends. Updates. Wrecker calls. Nothing running.... Bad news everywhere.
I checked Facebook to see what was being said and found a comment from a very cheery wife of a friend. You know... the type who posts on everything...
ex.
-Just cleaned under my toe nails...
-washed my whites.. Now I'm drying them..
Her post was...
-They're calling it a Snow-Pocalypse... But I say Snow-Topia.
I put down the Facebook and decided to get out of the car and try and speed up the rescue by helping someone else get free. I still really had to go pee.
Hour 3
After 10 minutes I returned to my car. Numb hands. Wet numb feet. I updated all my friends via text. Then took my shoes off and hung my wet socks on the air vent to dry. I turned my heater up and checked my Facebook again to find this message from the same friends wife...
-"Sitting at home by the fire watching the snow outside and warming my cozy toesies".
Hour 4
The first sign of hope came when a miniature monster truck with all terrain wheels showed up like a super hero and began pulling cars from the snow.
Within 45 minutes I was out and back on the road.
Less than three minutes later I was stuck again on the right side of the highway. Large trucks and SUV's passing by like ships and airplanes to a stranded man on an Island.
It was about this time that I began to wonder if I could ditch my car and walk the remaining 2.5 miles to my house.... I started thinking that if I could get to an open store (or maybe a large tree), I could at least shelter myself from the -9 windchill and relieve myself at the same time (#6).
Part 3 to come.
(that's right!!!!.... Rush Limbaugh.... I called it a right!!!!)
to pee as frequently as every other person on the planet.
I've spent more than a decade stretching and training my bladder to hold more and more urine. And I think... in Gods Providence.... it might have been in order to survive a urine crisis such as this.
I was sitting in my car.... stuck in the snow... Reeling from the bubble burst of not making it home. The sun was coming up but sheets of wind and snow were blowing over us keeping the sunlight dim. There were two cars in front of me. One beside me. About thirty or forty lined up behind.... all stuck. And I still had to go pee.
I had the heater going strong and for a few minutes I just watched as cars and SUV's arrogantly tried to drive around us... All of them getting trapped in the same snow pile. Half of them working hard to get themselves free. Each of them like ants... darting in and out of cars, splitting time between snow shoveling (5 to 10 minutes max without instant frozen death.... -small exaggeration) and sheltering themselves from the frigid wind.
End of hour # 1 on the highway,
Hour #2
I hooked up my I phone to my charger and then began to text my wife... and my boss and friends. Updates. Wrecker calls. Nothing running.... Bad news everywhere.
I checked Facebook to see what was being said and found a comment from a very cheery wife of a friend. You know... the type who posts on everything...
ex.
-Just cleaned under my toe nails...
-washed my whites.. Now I'm drying them..
Her post was...
-They're calling it a Snow-Pocalypse... But I say Snow-Topia.
I put down the Facebook and decided to get out of the car and try and speed up the rescue by helping someone else get free. I still really had to go pee.
Hour 3
After 10 minutes I returned to my car. Numb hands. Wet numb feet. I updated all my friends via text. Then took my shoes off and hung my wet socks on the air vent to dry. I turned my heater up and checked my Facebook again to find this message from the same friends wife...
-"Sitting at home by the fire watching the snow outside and warming my cozy toesies".
Hour 4
The first sign of hope came when a miniature monster truck with all terrain wheels showed up like a super hero and began pulling cars from the snow.
Within 45 minutes I was out and back on the road.
Less than three minutes later I was stuck again on the right side of the highway. Large trucks and SUV's passing by like ships and airplanes to a stranded man on an Island.
It was about this time that I began to wonder if I could ditch my car and walk the remaining 2.5 miles to my house.... I started thinking that if I could get to an open store (or maybe a large tree), I could at least shelter myself from the -9 windchill and relieve myself at the same time (#6).
Part 3 to come.
Snow-Pocalypse Blues: the story of a snow-driving fool.
My big mistake was answering so quickly. (Well... it was my first big mistake).
It all began when she asked me if I was gonna stay all night at the hospital and without missing a beat I told her I was driving home, but I would be back.
She gave me the look and then she just came out and said it. I think that's a mistake.
I blew her off. (2nd mistake).
I finished report... got my coat... my skull cap... and my keys and briskly I was out the door. I felt like I had to pee.. But it was a 25 minute drive home... maybe 45 with the snow... But I imagined I could wait (#3).
When my car slid out onto the street I could tell that what was happening was no ordinary snow storm. (Got stuck at the stop sign). But I navigated my first hurdle by rocking my car back and forth (drive-reverse... drive... reverse..) and then I was free. So I continued on (#4).
Truth is I made it about 95% of my way home in wind and snow like a Sarhara sand storm.....
(guy on the radio kept using the word "Blizzard" which made me feel uncomfortable...... so I turned the radio off) .....
And I passed stranded cars in mountains of snow all the way. My muscles were tensing... struggling to line up with the snow grooves that successful cars (actually trucks, jeeps and SUV's) made before me. And as I entered my home-city-limits I began the mileage countdown...
5 miles...
Over the bridge... Starting to see buildings...
4 miles....
Quicktrip.. McDonalds... Braums...
3 miles...
Big Lots... Reasors... Liquor store..
But as quickly as making the decision to make the trip home to begin with... I made a gut decision to avoid dead-end traffic on the highway up ahead and took the exit that was on my immediate right hand side (#5)....
(It was the exit with stranded cars and hidden unplowed snow drifts at least 2 feet high). And then all of a sudden like a fly in a web, I was stuck. And then all the real fun began.
Part 2 later today.
It all began when she asked me if I was gonna stay all night at the hospital and without missing a beat I told her I was driving home, but I would be back.
She gave me the look and then she just came out and said it. I think that's a mistake.
I blew her off. (2nd mistake).
I finished report... got my coat... my skull cap... and my keys and briskly I was out the door. I felt like I had to pee.. But it was a 25 minute drive home... maybe 45 with the snow... But I imagined I could wait (#3).
When my car slid out onto the street I could tell that what was happening was no ordinary snow storm. (Got stuck at the stop sign). But I navigated my first hurdle by rocking my car back and forth (drive-reverse... drive... reverse..) and then I was free. So I continued on (#4).
Truth is I made it about 95% of my way home in wind and snow like a Sarhara sand storm.....
(guy on the radio kept using the word "Blizzard" which made me feel uncomfortable...... so I turned the radio off) .....
And I passed stranded cars in mountains of snow all the way. My muscles were tensing... struggling to line up with the snow grooves that successful cars (actually trucks, jeeps and SUV's) made before me. And as I entered my home-city-limits I began the mileage countdown...
5 miles...
Over the bridge... Starting to see buildings...
4 miles....
Quicktrip.. McDonalds... Braums...
3 miles...
Big Lots... Reasors... Liquor store..
But as quickly as making the decision to make the trip home to begin with... I made a gut decision to avoid dead-end traffic on the highway up ahead and took the exit that was on my immediate right hand side (#5)....
(It was the exit with stranded cars and hidden unplowed snow drifts at least 2 feet high). And then all of a sudden like a fly in a web, I was stuck. And then all the real fun began.
Part 2 later today.
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